Speaking Up

Driving to the grocery store recently, I saw a bumper sticker that read, "Your Silence Will Not Protect You," and it really got me thinking. While I'm sure it's not what the author (Audre Lorde) originally intended, I mused about how applicable the concept is to those coping with food allergies/intolerances: We must speak up to make sure our needs are met.

Earlier this week, B. and I were out to dinner, and I had to send my food back. I had asked the waiter about the dairy content in the restaurant's mashed potatoes, and was told they would be fine for me. So I ordered green beans and mashed potatoes with my entree, clarifying that no dairy should be used for either. But when my plate arrived, the beans glistened with butter. I asked the server who delivered my plate (it wasn't my waiter) about it. He went back to the kitchen to check, and returned shortly, confirming there was dairy in both the vegetable and potato dishes. He promptly took my plate, and a little while later, my food came back, dairy-free, with a fresh entree, plain beans and mashed sweet potatoes. It was a great meal, one that I thoroughly enjoyed. But had I not said something, my experience that evening would have been entirely different.

Before I was diagnosed with celiac disease, when eating out, I would occasionally send food back if it was cold or wasn't prepared properly, and I might get a little anxious about it, not really wanting to make a fuss. That doesn't happen anymore. There are no qualms. If my food isn't right, I send it back without the least bit of hesitation. In the event that I do have to complain, I make every effort to be pleasant about it, but I will not eat something that I know will make me sick.

If I don't speak up for myself in situations like the other evening, who will? Granted, I have friends and family members who would gladly do so, but ultimately, it's my responsibility. After all, if I didn't, I'd be the one to deal with the consequences. To paraphrase Audre Lourde, remaining quiet just because it might be a little uncomfortable to speak up isn't going to protect me. And, in the long run, I'd be a whole lot more uncomfortable if I stayed silent.